I just cannot get into the holiday spirit anymore. I haven't been able to for years. I think it's time to stop trying. It just isn't meant to be.
Depression is kicking my ass, I have to work til the 20th, I'm broke...ffffffuuuuuuuuucccckkkk this.
Oh, and then there is the whole unsure about the existence of the Divine thing.
Sure, I'm happy that the light will return on the solstice. I hate the darkness of this time of year. In addition to good ol' depression, I suffer from SAD. It's a lovely combination.
I still plan to do some baking for my friends and family for the holidays. I fully intend to go through the motions this year, but what about next year? And the year after that?
Part of me is ready for a new year to begin, but the rest of me knows it won't make a damned bit of difference. SSDD, my friends. SSDD.
Oh, and that food drive I wanted to organize at work? Chica in charge totally forgot about it. Nice. Sorry you have to go hungry this holiday, kids!
I will try to scrape together a donation once I get paid and get more bills taken care of, I suppose.
/bitching
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